


Into the Kaoruverse

by DivineNoodles



Category: BanG Dream! (Anime), BanG Dream! Girl's Band Party! (Video Game)
Genre: AU where Himari and Rimi act like KPop stans, Contractually obligated to say Stan LOOΠΔ, Crack, F/F, Gen, Humor, Light Swearing, wait that's just canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-13
Updated: 2020-12-13
Packaged: 2021-03-10 19:26:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,452
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28052397
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DivineNoodles/pseuds/DivineNoodles
Summary: Himari and Rimi introduce Chisato to the idea of the Kaoruverse.
Relationships: Seta Kaoru/Shirasagi Chisato, Shirasagi Chisato & Uehara Himari & Ushigome Rimi, Uehara Himari/Ushigome Rimi
Comments: 26
Kudos: 57





	Into the Kaoruverse

**Author's Note:**

  * For [valkyriereverie](https://archiveofourown.org/users/valkyriereverie/gifts).



> Belated bday fic. Have a good one Selene! Hope you enjoy~!

While it was hard to fit into her packed schedule, Chisato always tried to make time to hang out with her fellow bassists. Whether it was gift-shopping with Lisa or running more yard sales with Hagumi or even gathering everyone together for an old-fashioned group practice, she felt a particularly warm kinship with each of them. That said, whenever Himari and Rimi asked her to meet up, there was ever only one topic of discussion. So Chisato packed her bag full of the unsolicited headshots Kaoru gave her once a week (autographed, of course) and traipsed on over to the mall food court, hoping that this time they’d just ask her for Kaoru’s preferred toothpaste brand or something equally banal.

Himari waved her over as soon as she arrived, slurping down a strawberry milkshake with gusto. “Chisato-san! Thanks for coming!”

A rehearsed smile. “Of course, Himari-chan. I would do anything for a fellow bassist.”

Rimi - eating a chocolate cornet, of course - wiped her mouth with a napkin. “W-We know how busy you are, so really, thank you.”

“Pay it no mind.” Chisato unzipped her bag. “What is it you wanted this week? Headshots? Anecdotes? Kaoru’s favorite scent of dish soap?”

“Actually, it was us who wanted to talk to you,” said Himari, gulping down the last of her shake. “We had some theories about the Kaoruverse, you see…”

“I’m sorry, the what?”

“Y’know, the Kaoruverse?” Himari made a gesture with her hands akin to ‘how do you not know?’ “The connected lore behind Hello, Happy World! and more specifically Kaoru-senpai?”

Chisato fell into the seat opposite them. “I’m afraid you’ve lost me.”

“Oh dang! I thought every Armada would’ve known about it.”

“Armada?” Chisato’s already-flabbergasted eyes grew wider. “What in the world…?”

“Oh, that’s what Kaoru fans are called,” Rimi explained. “Because we’re a bunch of fleets.”

“That’s right!” Himari enthused, puffing up her chest. “And the SS HimaRimi is the strongest ship in all the Armada!”

Rimi blushed. “R… Really?”

“Of course! No other ship has a captain as cute and sweet as you.”

Rimi melted into a gushing mess on the table. Chisato, unaffected by the display, was caught up in semantics. “Armada… why didn’t you just call yourselves Kittens?

“That was our fan nickname before Kaoru-senpai gave us an official one,” Himari replied. 

“I… see.” Chisato cleared her throat. “So what is this ‘Kaoruverse’?”

“W-Well…” stammered Rimi, regaining some composure, “If you pay attention to the storylines and events of Harohapi videos, you’ll start to notice that there’s an extensive story connecting them all.”

“Is there…?” Chisato appreciated their music greatly, but didn’t take HHW’s music to ever mean much more than “smile and be happy.”

“There is!” said Himari emphatically, pulling out an easel, presentation board, and pointer from seemingly nowhere. “First, the Kaoruverse is separated into three planes of existence: Earth, Middle Earth, And Happy Earth. The ‘Happy Earth’ level is also referred to as Eden.”

“The different members of the band inhabit different planes,” Rimi continued. “Kokoro-chan and Michelle live on Eden. Kaoru-san and Hagumi-chan are from Middle Earth. Kanon-senpai and Misaki-chan inhabit Earth.”

“These planes can also be seen as the sides of a möbius strip,” Himari continued, turning over one page of the board to show a diagram. “At the bottom here we see Earth, the foundation of all fleetingness, the light side of reality. Then there’s the middle plane, a cosmic space whose inhabitants possess supernatural abilities. Oh yeah, forgot to mention that. Hagumi-chan and Kaoru-senpai have superpowers. Have you ever wondered why Hagumi-chan can run so fast? Or why Kaoru-senpai can use so many big words? That’s why.”

Chisato was speechless.

“And of course, there’s Eden,” said Rimi. “Kokoro-chan and Michelle, as the enlightened ones inhabiting the highest plane of existence, possess knowledge as to the true meaning of happiness, and attempt to enrich all aspects of the Kaoruverse by it.”

“You can see key clues to this all in the MV for Orchestra of Smiles, Hagumi’s intro vid, and the choreo for Goka! Gokai? Phantom Thief.” Himari’s rambling was growing so fast that it was becoming nigh-incomprehensible. “If properly analyzed, one can understand the secret behind life, existence, and fleetingness itself.”

“This sounds like… quite a theory,” said Chisato with a cough.

Himari laughed. “Oh, this is just ground-level stuff! Kaoru-senpai’s already confirmed half of it in interviews. The actual theories go way deeper.”

Rimi cleared her throat. “For example, if you look at the borders of music videos, you’ll notice color disparities between each one. Yellow, purple, orange, blue, and pink… the image colors of the members. But what do they mean? How much are the members of the Kaoruverse aware of its own existence?”

“Then there’ ‘Evil Kaoru’ theories.” Himari flipped a page of the board over to show a Kaoru headshot with a goatee scribbled on. “You see, there’s an alternate side to the möbius strip where--”

“Hold on,” said Chisato “An alternate side? Isn’t the whole point of möbius strips that they only have one side?”

“Not if you consider all ten dimensions,” said Himari coolly. “This mirror Kaoru from an alternate universe shows up in certain locations… Wacha Mocha Pettan March and Happiness! Happy Magical! are all but confirmed, with some arguing she also makes an appearance in their cover of Silhouette. Her motives are unclear, but suggest the presence of a mirror universe. This brings us to the most popular non-Kaoru theory of the lore, the ‘Michelle is Misaki’ theory…”

Rimi sighed. “Himari-chan, I keep telling you, Misaki  _ is  _ Michelle…”

“IN REAL LIFE, PERHAPS!” Himari bellowed, slamming a fist into the table. “But is the character Misaki also the character Michelle? Do they possess self-actualization? Tell me, Rimirin!” She emphasized her point by shaking Rimi by the shoulders.

“Um…” Chisato coughed. “So what did you want to ask me?”

“Oh, right.” Himari let go of Rimi, composing herself. “We wanted to know if you knew the makeup of Kaoru’s DNA.”

_ “....I’m sorry, what?” _

“Ah, DNA Theory,” said Rimi. “So you know how DNA is made of certain nitrogen bases? Adenine, Thymine, Guanine, and Cytosine… usually abbreviated as A, T, G, and C. It’s theorized that these correspond to certain members of the band.”

Himari turned to a new presentation board page. “kAnon, kokoro Tsurumaki, haGumi, miChelle… but none for Kaoru. The theory goes that she exists outside the bounds of human biology, not a mortal being but in fact a concept that can only be described as ‘fleeting.’”

“If that were true, she wouldn’t have any DNA, would she?” asked Rimi. “She would be like a spirit, only flesh and no soul… or maybe all soul with no flesh? It would help us clarify either way if you knew.”

“...I don’t know what to say,” said Chisato. “Kaoru is not some concept. There’s no evil version of her. She’s a theater kid.”

“Are you sure?” asked Rimi. “They say that if you speak her name three times in a row, she’ll appear, no matter the time or place…”

“That’s just fact!” chimed Himari. “See look! Kaoru Seta, Kaoru Seta, Kaoru Seta!”

Right on cue, Kaoru (who Chisato had noticed hiding one booth over as early as ten minutes ago) popped up in a truly fleeting pose. “Verily, I have arrived… darling kittens, what is it that you require?”

Himari and Rimi squealed inaudibly. Chisato just sighed. “You know, don’t you? You were sitting over there for ages.”

“Alas, my attention span is… how do you say? Fleeting…”

Unfortunately, her close proximity to Kaoru instantly overloaded Rimi’s mind, sending her into a state of catatonic shock and falling right into Himari’s arms. “Rimirin! Oh, not again!” Himari hoisted her up in a perfect princess carry. “I’m gonna take her to the closest clinic. Kaoru-senpai, I’d love for you to come, but last time we did that she just fainted again, so…”

“I understand,” said Kaoru, hand to her heart. “Godspeed.”

Himari jogged off with surprising athleticism, leaving Chisato alone with her girlfriend.

“Truly, was I needed for anything?” asked Kaooru, taking a seat.

Chisato shook her head. “I’m surprised how invested people can become in fictional universes, It must take so much time.”

“Mm.” Kaoru tapped a finger against the table. “By the way, Chisato, have you yet played the latest Kingdom Hearts game?”

_ “Have I.” _ Chisato’s demeanor melted away in an instant. “Don’t get me fuckin’ started, Kao-chan. I wouldn’t trust Nomura as far as I could throw him. Like, fictional worlds? Quadrantum? Shibuya, but no TWEWY? What the hell does any of it mean?”

“I know not. I simply wished to state that Simple and Clean made me cry.”

“Me too, Kao-chan, me too.”

**Author's Note:**

> We didn't even talk about the strangely large portion of Armadas who are communist.
> 
> Anyway, the moral of the story is that Loona and Kingdom Hearts are the same. (And Chisato is 100% a KH stan you can take this headcanon from my cold, dead hands)
> 
> Speaking of Loona, consider listening to some of their music. Hi High is a bop.


End file.
